Antje wrote on her Facebook (June,2, 2012)
about this video:
of the month #4 and some thoughts on dreams...
many nights my work is just a job like any other, i won't lie.
but then there are the other kind of nights..... the nights that
i wish i could beam back to my younger self. to the girl who spent
long summers dreaming, guitar in hand and with all her heart.
the strongest dreams, i believe, begin in our youth. but they
come true throughout our lives. when they do, we can't linger
on their summit. when a dream finally comes true, it also dies
a little. like a shooting star that only you saw, so brilliant
and so mortal. truly beautiful things don't last. but they come
i was 17 i was lost. things were strange at home. things were
strange at school. having grown up in germany, i was now going
to high school in greenville, delaware. i couldn't make sense
of the kids at school. their behaviors seemed impossible to decode.
in germany i was normal. i knew what i was doing. now i didn't.
i longed for my language and my culture and my friends from before.
things were strange at home, too. so i lived in between. in the
space between home and school. i walked and i walked around the
suburbs. my discman taking me far away. i listened to the music
of john gorka. i can't say i understood the lyrics, really, but
i understood the voice. his warm baritone wrapped itself around
me like a shield. i'm not sure how i would have made it through
those years without that shield. fast forward 20 years. i am on
tour with john gorka, the man. he is just a man. it is just a
gig. he does what i do for a living and i know - as i am an insider
- that there is no real magic there. i know all this but my heart
I have come full-circle. the music is still here. after all these
years. and it moves me deeply still because it is intertwined
with my own past and the genesis of my dream. john gorka has come
full circle too. we are playing at Godfrey Daniels, Gorka's stomping
ground. the place where he cut his teeth. where he had his heroes.
and so it goes. i am not sure any of us would be doing what we
do if it weren't for our heroes and the gifts they gave us. this
is my "full circle moment" but it is not that of the crowd and
so i aim to conceal the monumental weight this event holds in
my heart, but on the inside me, old me, present me, myself and
i are beaming... maybe you can spot it on our face :)